An Onion

My best friend at work says I’m like an onion.  She might secretly mean that I make her cry, which I sometimes do, but usually only because we are laughing so hard about something inappropriate/ridiculous/outrageous.  What she says is that the longer she knows me the more layers she finds to peel back.  There was a column this summer in The Guardian posing the question of whether one is a peach or coconut.  I think I might just be an onion, taking periods of time to unsurface the next layer.  Although maybe it makes me a coconut.

What makes me an onion is that I recognize one has to be vulnerable to form connections, but I’ve been burned enough to know that being totally vulnerable is reckless.  Not everybody has earned the right to my stories.  It’s why it took me five years to start a blog.  I wasn’t ready to share everything and in some cases anything.

So let’s peel back the first layer.  10 things you didn’t know about me:

1. I love to cook, but can’t bake to save my life.  There is something about the process of making something nourishing with my hands that attracts me to my kitchen.  I love to feed people.

2. I never thought my love of feeding people would translate into feeding other babies besides my own.  I was the regular donor to 2 babies in addition to Littles for almost a year.  One of the moms I donated to thinks I’m an angel, but she is the real angel. On days where I didn’t think I was worth the air I breathed, she reminded me my milk had brought her son back to health.

3. My dream job was always Stay at Home Mom, until I was a mom.  We had planned for it our entire marriage and then I couldn’t imagine not working outside the home. Having options allowed me the freedom to pursue a passion.

4. 71 days after starting to date my husband, I knew he was going to be the man I would marry.  I had just turned 20.  It’s how I know 20 year-old can make good decisions even if they aren’t totally mature and that God exists.

5. My first day back to work after Littles was born, I forgot to lock the door to the nursing mother’s room at work.  It was mortifying… for the man who walked in on me. Seared in his mind is a picture of me in black tights topless hooked up to a breast pump.

6. I’m a very deep sleeper and often do things in my sleep that I have no recollection of the next day.  It’s been my whole life, but my poor husband had to shake me awake from a dream in which I was loudly proffering coupons for guns.  There was also a time in 8th grade where I slept walked into my brothers bed.  Awkward!!!

7. I grew up in Minnesota and didn’t know that snow melted during the winter until I went to college.  My husband still makes fun of me.  Uff-da.

8. Moving helps me think.  Talking out loud helps me formulate ideas.  I have a rock at my desk that I rub when I’m anxious.

9. I hate surprises. Not just bad surprises, like “Oops! I  crapped on the floor and didn’t mention it to you, Mom!”, but all surprises.  Surprise gifts (even if they are awesome), surprise destinations, and surprise parties.

10 I’m not a picky eater.  Something new? I’ll give it a try. Tasting menu? Why not? The line is drawn when it comes to powdered sugar.  Icing made with powdered sugar is great, but anything garnished with powdered sugar… no, thank you.  I have an irrational fear that I’ll sneeze and be covered in a pouf of white sugar.



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